Sevinc17 avatar
Sevinc17
5
5 days ago

I sick of trying to get along with school. I am sick of this shit.

I have physics exam tomorrow and I didn’t study until now. It is nearly 11 pm and I have to study for seven hours at least. I had wanted to study for exams but I am no more than a failure. I am acting like I don’t stress about anything because I have to make myself calm and I procrastinated so hard I don’t have hope for me anymore. I always believed in myself but it only makes me so stolid and I realized that I am overestimating myself. No one in my life doesn’t try to help me and I need some support right now when time is like this. I need somebody to tell me “Everything is going to be okay.” or “You are doing enough and you will get through this.” kinda things. I don’t even want to study but I am also not a person who isn’t care about academy. I wanted to do my best but I am not even doing %20 of what I am capable of and it makes me feel so… dumb. I know I can but I can’t at the same time. I am stuck in this shitty phase even I thought that I healed but apparently I am not. I am loathing the education system and the governments and patriarchy and everything that includes woman and man relationships. They’re all unnatural and stilted. Anyway. I have to be gojo tonight.


9 comments
10

Posts and comments here share personal experience — not medical advice. For treatment questions, talk to a clinician.


crazyraccoon avatar
crazyraccoon
19
3 days ago

I always felt like this when I was in high school too. 🥲 I wish you all the best. You can do it!


marisloth avatar
marisloth
26
4 days ago

I don’t usually post on here but reading your post felt like revisiting so many moments from my own school/academic years. I relate to it completely!! You’re not dumb, and you’re not a failure. It’s the system that is failing you and most neurodivergent people. You’re going to be okay. Even with all the chaos, you’ll find your way and prove to everyone, and more importantly to yourself, just how capable and worthy you are. Be gentle with yourself. That’s probably the best tip I can give you. It makes a huge difference once you let go of the guilt 💛


Illia from Numo avatar
Illia from Numo
25
4 days ago

most of what we’re beating ourselves up over isn't our problems but a system problems. like martin said, school is built for ONE kind of brain. I had a genuinely horrible time in school too. we're not overestimating ourselves but underestimating how much energy it costs to do the things that's easy for other people. be on your own side more often ❤️🫂


Blabla avatar
Blabla
29
4 days ago

the Day I understood that prokrastination is an emotional problem and not a motivation problem, helped me. So: still working on it! Body doubling with partners to learn might help? Try stuff, whether it works for you. You're not alone in this battle!

Sevinc17 avatar
Sevinc174 days ago

I’m trying thanksss!


martin777 avatar
martin777
36
4 days ago

I totally understand. School was absolute terror for me too. First of all, please don’t put yourself down - school isn’t made for ppl with ADHD. It’s not your fault, it’s a faulty system. Sadly we’re all pushed through the school system in order to make us well behaved little workers. But that’s not working for ADHDers (thank god it doesn’t). The bad news: somehow, you’ll have to get through. The good news: there are so many opportunities that come after. Please keep your special mind and don’t let them dull it down. The world needs us badly, because neurodivergents are the ones that think outside of the box and actually change the world! Never forget: you are absolutely amazing! Keep shining 🍀🫂🫶🏻

Sevinc17 avatar
Sevinc174 days ago

Thanks a lot 🥹🥹🙃

martin777 avatar
martin7773 days ago

So how’d the exam go? 🍀


emmB@ avatar
emmB@
34
5 days ago

You’re in crisis mode because of your exam tomorrow : it’s really gonna be okay, even if it doesn’t seem like it at all for now. You’re not dumb, and healing is a whole process that can take a long time, but being upset now and unable to study regularly doesn’t mean that you haven’t already made progress. Be kind to yourself, and I hope you feel better after your exam and/or sleeping… (you should consider skipping the studying part and going to bed, but I know it can seem impossible - I’ve been there too)